INFERTILITY WARRIOR Blog

What’s with all the twins in Hollywood???  Could it be fertility treatments??   If it is, why do we hear so little about it?  What is with the shame and stigma of infertility, especially those celebrities who are so open about other facets of their lives?

Jennifer Lopez really disappoints me because after years of rumors of fertility clinic visits she has fraternal twins AND talks to people magazine about how they were conceived naturally and that she knew there was nothing wrong with her.  Maybe, but what would be “wrong” with her if she had used fertility treatments??? 

The second one I am highly skeptical of is Angelina Jolie and getting pregnant at 33 with fraternal twins – a 1 in 1,000 chance.  Natural, sure it’s possible, but highly unlikely.  This is a woman who is no shrinking violet – proudly telling a reporter on a red carpet she and her then husband Billy Bob Thornton had just had sex in the limo minutes before.  Yet, if she used infertility treatments to conceive the newest additions, she is staying quiet.

Why aren’t these celebs more open?  Does infertility make a woman less attractive?  Less bankable?  Enough!!!

Thankfully there are Celebrity Infertility Warrior/Survivors:  Bravo to Marcia Cross, who was open about using fertility treatments as a single woman before meeting her husband.  (She talked about IVF and how some women need donor eggs – wow – what a woman!), the Dixie Chicks sisters Emily and Marti who wrote a song about infertility’s emotional impact as well as showing their struggle in the excellent documentary “Shut Up and Sing”, Brooke Shields, Cindy Margolis, Brenda Strong, and Sherri Shepherd.

Check out this website for more information on celebrities that have battled infertility – www.nobabyonboard.com

Let us take a cue from cancer survivors and claim the term “Infertility Survivor”, raise awareness by using a symbol (the burgundy heart and spiral.)  This life and medical crisis has changed me forever, as it has most other women I have met.    

It is time to take back our power from infertility and use it to change society to make it a much more supportive and kind world for future Infertility Survivors! 

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Finally, Life Medals (www.lifemedals.com) is up and ready for business selling the Fertilty Hope Pendants in sterling silver and solid 14 karat yellow gold!  Full disclosure, Life Medals is my company. 

I have read some 'experts' say that blogs should be personal and not related to business, but for me, my company is extremely personal.  If Life Medals succeeds not only will it help me pursue my dream of motherhood but on a bigger scale I will be able to help millions of other 'infertiles' fortify and validate their journeys to parenthood.  My fellow Infertility Survivors, we are going to ROCK this world and change the way people think of infertility.

The Fertility Hope pendant was created after three heartbreaking years of infertility.  While doing everything I could to become pregnant, I was discouraged to find no symbol to validate my struggle, nothing tangible to focus on and draw strength.  I knew this struggle was forever changing me, regardless of the outcome.  I would never take pregnancy or motherhood for granted the way I once did, the way most fertile people do. 

I am forever changed by this rollercoaster of grief, but I have chosen to take the lemons that infertility has pelted at me over the past 4 years and make lemonade.

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 Visualize a day when women will feel proud of surviving infertility.  It's coming.  Can you see it?   A day when the stigma and shame will be replaced with admiration and support.  A day when your in-laws, friends, and co-workers know the fundamentals and the emotional impact of your battle with infertility. 

 A day when celebrities will speak openly about their difficult path to parenthood.  There was a time, not long ago, when breast cancer was stigmatized.  Now in a sea of pink ribbons women proudly tell their stories. I see a day when the ignorant and insensitive remarks will be rare. Today, October 1st, 2008 I publicly enter the battle to raise awareness and reframe how society views women (and men) suffering from infertility.  

 May the Infertility Warrior symbolize the fierce strength of a momma bear protecting her cub.  We must tap into this primal feminine power that we all have to better survive infertility.  Find it and use this energy.  You may repeatedly get knocked down, but you must get up.  The traits you hone and the character you build during your infertility struggle will serve you well as a parent. 

 Rise up my Sisters In Fertility!  Reframe your thinking - infertility is a battle! Plant your feet firmly on the ground, stand straight, chin up, breathe deep and channel your inner warrior. 

If you persist and are open to the many paths to motherhood, some how, some way, and some day, YOU WILL BE A MOTHER! 

Patrice
aka: Infertility Warrior

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